Saturday, October 31, 2009

Killer Plants!

Boo! Bwahahaha! Grr! Rawr! Gary Busey! ARGH!

Now that's I've got the scares out, you're ready to endure a onslaught of scary movie monsters! I'm here to count down a bunch of movie monsters by category. First category is Killer Plants! I don't know till what I'll count down to; I think till I run out of monsters, memory, categories and my mortal life. I think I''ll keep it running till after halloween to strecht out the fun times, since everyone has been doing for the last week. Now lets get this started!

Pod People









Yes from Invasion of the Body Snatchers! I always loved those silly pod people taking over bodies only to drone about endlessly taking over the world. I wanted something more plant like but I couldn't think of anything else really, and nobody likes lists of 4, that's simply unnatural. Best defense against these weeds? Well hard to say exactly, Jeff Goldblum wasn't a full life saving capacity in the 70's and early 80's, he wasn't able to stop a plant invasion nor a fly mutation. So its nearly impossible to say the best defense he didn't learn how to defend against dinosaurs or create a virus for an alien mothership yet. If he would to have a rematch today he would of promplty kicked their ass in a screaching battle; 2 hours of Jeff Goldblum and a pod person screaching contest? best movie ever or best ever ever? Let Jeff Goldblum decide.

Biollante


















Descendant (kinda) of the badass himself, Godzilla. True man might be the true monster from messing with god and creating this abomination, but the creation is still the giant city destroying monster here. With the constant tampering of Godzillas radioactive DNA (I miss the days where radiation could do whatever the hell you wanted) scientists crated this mosnter from studying the supernatural properties of a rose. Best Defense against this rose? Fucking Godzilla.

Killer Tomatoes













I fucking hate tomatoes. I don't like tomatoes on anything I eat really, sure maybe paste or something because then it can jump on you. My dad grows tomatoes in our garden, which I keep telling him to destroy them all. He always responds "You simply haven't eaten a good tomato yet" and I keep responding "You simply haven't had a tomato kill you...yet...". Best defense against this vegetable somehow parading as fruit? Angsty teen love music! I think? Whatever catch one and put your Ipod in shuffle and see what'll kill it.

Triffids













Now these are the bad boys here, from Day of the Triffids. They frikin wait or appear at the same time something appear to blind more than 99% of the world. When that happens they wobble endlessly shooting poison at people, and no they don't eat them immediatly they wait till they frikin decompose, ya know because of the lack of mouth and everything. Its juste a giant waiting game for these guys. Best defense? Walking away and anything thicker than a bed sheet to stop the spitting poison.

Audry II












Now here's the king of all the plant monsters, from Little Shops of Horrors! He doesn't muck around with one talent, he uses every horror aspect, he's a killer plant who messes with your head to get you to kill people, oh and he's a mean green mother from outerspace bent on world domination. Not to mention his amazing singing voice. Best defense? hard to say I haven't see the original version, but I have seen the movie musical version and he is destroyed. But the irky detail is that in the original version of the musical he multiplies and takes over the world and seems nearly invincible. So if you can't beat em' join em'

Monday, October 26, 2009

Mega Monday : Captain N

There was this short lived show that came in a little bit before my time, but I still caught of bunch of random clips and stuff from the internet. From those clips which include most of time the internet mocking every single aspect of it, I came to the conclusion that it really really does suck. So thats the story of Captain N the Gamemaster forever remembered for butchering almost every all while whoring them out. The premise is simply taking all the most popular video game characters from the time and shove them into one show (like I said, all the while raping each of their respective personalities)

There's Simon Belton from Castlevania which was butchered the most out of all but Megaman was a prominent figure of the shows running and he wasn't exactly treated justly either. Surprisingly Dr.Wily is the most accurate depictions of any characters in the show, an evil Einstein which is bent on world domination.

I can understand that you can't get much personality out of the games because Megaman never does say much or even determining the look of him can be hard, the box arts proved us that many times. Now this is simply ridiculous they didn't even get his color right, I mean his nickname is the Blue Bomber and yet you don't even make him blue. FAIL.
They kinda got his size from the 8-bit version, but the green and the visors, whats that? Now I don't really want to get into the personality because there was nothing to base it upon, but they could of done something better. He has this coarse annoying voice and he's a little angsty about being a robot as opposed to a man. Really nothing really meshes with the awesomeness he's supposed to be. But there is one part which is even more confusing; so MegaGirl comes bursting into the scene and she's all over Megaman but he turns her down with the good ol' "I'm not a man" (aka: u ugly).

Yeah thats right Megaman, you got 99 robot masters and a bitch ain't one.

...

Monday, October 12, 2009

Mega Mondays : Megaman 5

I've missed what? Two Mega Mondays in a row? Meh, I guess I'm not fully committed to it yet, I probably could of cranked something out but got some priorities straight for a change. Not only speaking Mega Mondays but in the last weeks I've not been home much and in result not posting anything, mostly staying in town late to save some gas money, double trips are highly frowned upon. So in a way, I've not been that much busy but since I stayed in town it never let me post things from home, not helping that my Sundays and especially Mondays have been really busy, which is usually when I write my Mega Mondays. Whatever, it won't get any better in the next month.

Now Megaman 5! I fired up the game, and realized that after the fourth Megaman Original I don't have that much experience with the rest of the series. After 3 I would say that the population kinda forgets about the rest, don't exactly know why but they just do, even regarding them a inferior iterations of the series. Having less experience of the game made me realize that games can still physically and mentally kick my ass, not sure if by aging you lose some of your skills or that I just had more patience when I was young but the game continually kicked my ass. I will admit that some are harder but this one caught me on a bad day or something.
This game I found that it is highly underrated! They cranked out again an amazing looking game, constant changing backgrounds depending on the levels, and the boss sprites especially look to have more depth to them, they don't look as flat as they did in the older games, especially Star and Wave Man. As for Megaman he hasn't changed, apart from a fancier charge up shot he's still small and blue. I'm also really glad that they found decent powers for the Robot Masters, sure there GyroMan in this one but he's the only relatively lame one in the game, and his battle is actually fun.Where the game really shines is in, the perfect execution of Megaman's sliding ability. The level is perfectly designed so you have to use this to progress, not only this but it speeds up the game quite considerably. I'm all for speedier gameplay by choice (why I was majorly disappointed at Brawl!), and the slide technique does exactly this. Enemies seem to shoot and attack in way that you are able to dodge them easier by sliding, same effect from some obstacles, sure some can be dodge without it but its a little harder. I really digged the boss battles in this one, they really come all out towards you, so you need speed to get away and counterattack.
One little thing that bugs me is the story, which started the whole Protoman is evil gig. So this time it isn't Dr. Wily and his Robot Masters, its Protoman and his robot masters. Once again, no it isn't Dr.Wily made a Protoman clone and attacked, you kinda get some hints during the game that it isn't him but whatever nobody gives a damn. The funny thing is about video game stories is that, if you do have a good one, you will be praised, but if you don't you will get "video games don't need stories".Overall, it was really refreshing stepping into this one, didn't expect much from it, my memories seemed to have deceived me. Really it deserve more praise than it gets, although I know for a fact that it will soon all go downhill.